I haven’t been on facebook in months, and this morning I decided to visit it and realized why I haven’t been on it in months. People, who cares!! What dos that mean? Well, many don’t understand the social networking reasons. They think that as soon as you join Facebook or Twitter that means you have to post everything you do, say, think, even take pictures of. NO! No! No! Listen, we don’t care that you woke up to eat, that you just figured out a catchy saying that has no relation to anyone, that you just came out of Starbucks, took photos of your dog that has been dead for years –harsh I know, but I’m getting it out- that you have this many days till vacation –I actually had someone count down from 30 each day- or that you are STILL depressed and it caused people to actually delete you cause they are tired of being depressed each morning after reading your post! If you want to rant, get a blog!
It’s as if these social network sites have become a path for people who yearn for attention. Oh yes, if someone can’t stop talking about their dead grandma who died of natural causes- unlike mine who I found in a pool of blood- then open a blog. Why? You see every time you rant on social sites EVERYDAY we get emails, texts or actually see your post while waking up happy in the morning. And if you share a negative thing EVERYDAY that just takes my last shred of happiness away, do you really think it’s fair to me to keep you as a friend? At least with a blog, it’s ever so often, and you have time to figure out a solution.
So how should you use these sites? Take photos, write about how you found a new idea about happiness, use quotes that relate to the masses, say your grandma died only once and allow others to send their condolences, add in that you got that job promotion so we can say ‘congratulations’, or a funny story that happened to you. Something besides bragging about your career, your loss, your accomplishments, over and over and over again. That’s the problem! People, so many, don’t know when to stop posting! I would like to see how you are doing, but not every, single, fricken day!! I knew you 20 years ago, I found you, but I don’t want to hear from you 20 times a day. Please!
And what the heck is with these games on facebook? Listen, I don’t care if you scored 20,000 points on Cityville, or that you need a cow on Farmville, or a map on Castleville, sorry, but I don’t, even in the past when I played some of these games. What I do care about is you, your happiness’s, your moments captured on camera, your losses –only once please, for the love of God- and your feelings –twice a week please- or how your dog’s doing.
What I don’t want to read, EVERYDAY, is this.
Example. Let’s call her Sarah. Sarah posts, Monday, “I’m so depressed,” Tuesday, “F… my life,” Wednesday, “I hate my life, “Thursday, “Screw it all,” Friday, “I hate me,” Saturday, “I hate my job, and Sunday, –no day of rest for Sarah- “Damn, everything!”
What? I mean, the first post on Monday I responded, “Cheer up,” on Tuesday, “It’ll be okay,” Wednesday, “Oh my” and Thursday, “Hmm, I think I need a drink.” The rest of the days I was busy trying to get my doctor to raise my Prozac dosage! Thanks, Sarah!! By the way, here’s a good psychiatrist number, talk to him instead of posting, please!
Oh, and then there’s Bill. Oh everyone knows a Bill.
Bill Example. Bill posts, Monday, “I love my job,” Tuesday, “I’m moving up faster than anyone at my job,” Wednesday, “My boss loves me, “Thursday, “Got a huge raise, gonna BMW shop today,” Friday, “My life is just perfect,” Saturday, “Big interview with a studio today, I know I’ll get it”, and Sunday, –no day of rest for Bill either- “Everything about me is just perfect!”
Okay? I mean, the first post on Monday I responded, “I’m glad your blessed,” on Tuesday, “Way to go, I knew you would,” Wednesday, “That’s good, Bill” and Thursday, “Uh, huh.” By Sunday I was busy trying to get my doctor to raise my Prozac dosage even more, due to Bill’s perfect life that he reminds us about every day! Thanks, Bill, you jerk!!!
Listen, on average people have 200 friends on facebook-wild guess. And if we have 200 Sarah’s and Bill’s posting 365 days a year, what the hell do you think people like me are going to do? Stop using the network, or delete you! What, you think that’s harsh? So, what, you’re saying that I am obligated to hear Bill and Sarah’s rants everyday? Hell no!!!
Why? Because Bill’s on too much Prozac, and Sarah needs it. Once is good enough. If you hate or love your life, I will comment and try to cheer you up or remind you of how blessed you are because you are a good person. But… everyday? Hell no! Why? Why should we?
And with Twitter, my God! Celebrities on my Twitter account, listen, I don’t care about your project, everyday! We know when you’re promoting a film, when it’s you who’s writing and not your assistant, or how you took photo with another famous connection you just made at an LA party the night before and are acting like you knew them for years! But I can say, at least with twitter, the posts are usually one sentence. That’s nice.
People, I guess, have to learn to separate the term ‘blogging’ from ‘social posting’.
I’m a type of person who hardly posts at all on social sites. Maybe that’s why I opened up this blog, to teach me again to express my feelings in an environment where the readers are prepared for the subject matter. Not a social site where we are not prepared to be depressed everyday by Sarah.
LOL. Back to facebook. I once –yes once- had this friend who posted about her grandma’s death… everyday!!! From the day she died, for a month straight. Not to top her, but yes, my grandma, for which I loved like a mother died in a pool of blood- another story that I’m just not ready to discuss now- and I didn’t post about it at all. Yet, this girl would write about her grandma’s death everyday. The same type of sentences, just different wordings. OMG. After saying sorry for her loss and trying to cheer her up in everyway I know how, I had to block her. Harsh as it may sound, but everyone losses a loved one, has problems, and there’s only a little room to post yours before people start saying, “My God, she’s depressing me!!” What more did she want me to say? Her grandma was 99 years old! What did she think? That she would live to 199? I mean, after 1 whole month of posting about it everyday, it’s not fair to be their shrink when you have 199 more friends that post like Sarah or Bill.
It’s like a fire, I guess. You’re walking, trying to find the meaning of life, and suddenly you see a small fire in a house. It’s small, so you try to HELP and PUT OUT the flames. The next day, the same fire, the same place. You put it out again. The next day, a bigger fire, same place. You finally say, “Screw this, I’m calling the fire department.”
Moderation is the key. And so many people don’t get that. Try reading your own posts. Go on, I dare you. And if you look at your own posts like, “OMG, I’m depressing myself or making myself sick,” then stop and open a blog, write a book, call a shrink, because it’s just not fair to others. It isn’t. I have problems too. LOL. A lot. But I will never try to depress another without finding some sort of resolution to how I’m handling it. Or, I will open a blog with a blog title so innocent people will be prepared for what they might read. Like the fire analogy, if there’s going to be flames everyday, then warn us or seek professional help. But it’s not fair to depend on us to put out the flames everyday, especially without warning. Delete.
Example: I was finally enjoying my day this one time. Rare, for me back then. But suddenly I received a text message about Sarah’s post and her saying, “I hate my life.” What the hell do you think happened to me next? My happiness was shattered into oblivion because I was NOT PREPARED for the subject matter. This was before I knew how to stop ‘notifications’. Once again, thanks, Sarah!!
So… today I shall Delete so many people that have clogged my account with their useless, redundant ramblings. Oh Yes… Goodbye, Felix, I will not miss your wise quotes, EVERYDAY, like Practice what you Preach,” when you preach about what you have never practiced. You know those types. On there they seem so wise, but up close they’re anything but.
Goodbye, Sarah. I will not miss your negative posts, EVERYDAY, that could never be mended by the kindness of another’s comment. Even when I gave you the names of a few good shrinks, you just never took the time to contact them. Maybe, Sarah, you just like misery, like bringing others down. But, I won’t give it a thought anymore, since I have MANY, MANY, MANY other supposed “friends” that I have to rethink my connections with.
Goodbye, Marcus. Oh, Marcus, Marcus, Marcus. I will not miss your narcissistic comments at all. I have stopped caring, Marcus, about how wonderful and successful your company is that you make sure to remind us every, single, fricken day!! I wish you the best. And before I go, please make sure you listen to others and give them a chance to speak about their successes, instead of stealing their spotlight.
The same goes for you, Bill!! So long, my once interesting friend, who used to know when to listen, wait, then comment instead of posting, posting and ppsting about your ‘perfect’ life. It’s not jealousy; it’s being annoyed with information overload. So much, that you probably won’t even read this ‘farewell’. A tip to you: open a blog, write about your perfect life, and then write about tips for others to help them live a perfect life as well. Delete.
And Shelly! How I will miss your posts about your high scores in games. So many posts that it makes me wonder how many hours you are playing in any given day. I never understood what you wanted. Did you want me to congratulate you that it took you 3 years to reach a million coins, or did you want me to rescue you and refer you to an addict counselor? I don’t know! Delete.
And Eric. So long my friend that I never knew but connected with anyway because you asked me to ‘friend’ you when I first started using the social site. You have over 2000 friends, 3 of which you know, and the rest that you simply collect like baseball cards. Well this baseball card can’t be bought!! LOL. Delete.
Oh, and you, Jen. A girl that found me through another one of my ‘friends’ sites that I don’t even know. Even though my status shows ‘engaged’, you still emailed me that you wanted to quote, unquote “Hook up!” Thank you so much for asking, for it caused fights when my beautiful fiancé saw it and because I don’t know you, I didn’t think it was important to delete the message. I was wrong!! Since I don’t have you as a ‘friend’, I have DELETED the people who are friends with you that are ‘supposed’ friends with me. Yes, they are the casualties, but it was your ignorance, and… I guess your ‘spam’ that ruined our never-existed friendship. Delete.
And before I delete many others, I would like to personally say goodbye to you, Darrell. Every post you placed was nothing more than your affiliate links to other sites. I know that you want to make it rich as an affiliate, and every comment you made had that very, very long affiliate link that connected me to a cheap salespage for an ebook that once cost $199 but is on sale for only $47. What a deal!! LOL. But having you as a friend was like us hanging out and every time we hung out you tried to sell me cheap knives. No conversations, but just sales pitches. Delete.
What’s the moral to this subjective rant? Moderation. And there’s no room for narcissistic people moving into the social neighborhood.
Post something, wait for a comment, and that’s it. Don’t post on the same problem or blessing everyday and just reword it. Why? Because you are not the center of attention while the other 199 people are posting their troubles once. Oh, and please stop ‘liking’ your own posts. Oh, and stop swearing so much in your posts. People may have kids that might accidentally read it or see that naked picture you posted that you don’t normally post. Even without the kids, swearing too much has a negative sentiment to people. It just does. Moderation, please! Thoughtful comments, good. Narcissistic comments, bad.